We don’t resist doing something new or different — in other words, we don’t resist change. We resist doing what we think is wrong. When you really get this distinction, you will understand something about human behavior that most psychologists and professionals in the training business still don’t understand... One example: “Yelling is the only way to get people to listen and do what you want.” That’s the belief that engenders the yelling. Given this belief, if you want to get someone to do something and they aren’t doing it, you have to yell to get results.

“It can’t be done” is never the truth. What people really are saying when they utter these words is: “I don’t how how to do it.”  Or, “it can’t be done the way we’ve always tried in the past.”  Or, “it can’t be done according to the only way I can think of doing it.” Here’s why “it can’t be done” is never an accurate statement, no matter what you are referring to... But doing something that has never been done before, that most people think is impossible isn’t that easy.  It takes guts.  It requires us to ignore the naysayers and not fear failure.  Unfortunately most of us are all too willing to accept “it can’t be done” both from others and from ourselves. Steve Jobs didn’t accept it.  Ever.

Are you bothered by a psychological problem that you aren’t even trying to get rid of because you think it’s “human nature” and can’t be eliminated? If so, you aren’t alone... There are a number of psychological traits that are so common that most people consider them to be inherent in human beings. In fact, however, they are not inherent in human nature at all.

How many times have you attended a personal growth workshop, or listened to a self-help audio course, or viewed a set of DVDs designed to change your life? And how many times did you get a high when you completed the program … that dissipated shortly, leaving you almost where you were before you started? Why don’t these courses that usually offer such valuable information produce lasting change?

If you give a man a fish, he will eat fish today but not have any fish for future meals. If you teach a man to fish, he will be able to eat fish forever as long as he is willing to catch the fish. There is a third possibility that is not often talked about: If you transform the man’s diet (for instance, have him become a vegetarian) so that he doesn’t eat fish any more, his problem of not having fish to eat is solved forever. Let’s apply the principle of this story to the rash of personal growth products and services we are offered daily.

"Don't let your limits knock your self-confidence. Put them to one side and push yourself towards your strengths." Richard Branson. -- The tens of millions of people who are interested in self-improvement have two different but related focuses: financial success and personal growth...But even for the people who do pursue both goals, I’m not sure that many people interested in self-improvement are aware that there is an inextricable connection between the two areas of life.

If you’ve read any of Seth Godin’s books or his daily blog, you know he stresses repeatedly, if you want to produce something new and change anything, you have to start and you have to “ship,” in other words, create a product or service and then make it available…Despite the fact that the need to start and ship (the need to move forward in life) is obvious, most people don’t do it. Seth correctly says that the major reason is fear of failure.

Most of the time we are only interested in attaining results and we don’t really care about detailed explanations for how we got those results. But sometimes knowing precisely how we achieved specific results enables us to have more control over producing those results consistently. I think I’ve just figured out how one of my processes works as well as it does... After learning about a intriguing new area of science called brain plasticity I think I now understand how the LOP (Lefkoe Occurring Process) works so well.

Although there probably aren’t many people who first experienced their anger in exactly the same way I did, there are millions who are terrified of experiencing their own anger or being in the presence of the anger of others.  Many people get in touch with that anger in therapy or some personal growth course, and millions never do. [Photo: Christian Bale reportedly earned the nickname “Tandy” because he was always throwing tantrums.]

If you follow these tips, you will be able to find at least some of the beliefs that cause specific problems... If you eliminate all the beliefs that usually cause a lack of confidence, for example, you also will be eliminating all the beliefs that cause several other problems, such as procrastination, social anxiety, fear of rejection, seeking approval, perfectionism, high levels of stress, and the critical “little voice” in our heads.