addictions : page 3........... .Talent Development Resources..home page

.. .. R&B hunk Eric Benet has spoken out for the first time about cheating on his stunning actress wife Halle Berry.  Benet made tabloid headlines last year when it emerged he had checked into The Meadows rehabilitation clinic in Wickenburg, Arizona, for sex addiction therapy after cheating on his Oscar-winning wife of two years.  He says, "Before, I was trying to portray an image of this person who I wanted to be - Mr. I'm So Spiritually In Touch With Myself, Mr. I Could Never Cheat On My Wife - I really did want to be all those things, but I just wasn't.

"I asked myself, 'Why did I do this thing? I am someone who is deeply in love with my wife. I want to be married... What is this weakness inside me that's allowing this to happen?'" Benet says of the therapy he and his wife sought after the incident, "It's an extremely painful process. I was so disconnected and not in touch with myself. For whatever reason I had not faced some painful things in my life. "I just kind of learned how to compartmentalize my emotions and not really deal with them. It's a very dangerous thing because then you start doing s*** that doesn't make sense."  He adds, "This past year has been cathartic as far as learning what marriage and relationships are all about. It took all this s*** for me to get real, but now I'm singing and writing more honestly." [imdb.com]     one of the founders of The Meadows is Pia Mellody, R.N., C.A.C. -  her books include:  Breaking Free : A Recovery Handbook for Facing Codependence Facing Love Addiction : Giving Yourself the Power  to Change the Way You Love

*related pages:......counseling / therapy......relationships

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"Don't blame the addict" is the message we often hear from treatment facilities. But psychologist Jeffrey Schaler [right] says we're stronger than we think, and that overeating, smoking and other so-called addictions are things we can choose to control. "Addiction is a behavior and all behaviors are choices," says Schaler, author of the book Addiction is a Choice. ...  Stanton Peele, author of Diseasing of America, says, "The United States has elevated addiction to a national icon. It's our symbol, it's our excuse." from "Help Me, I Can't Help Myself" - A John Stossel Special - ABCNews.com 4/21/03  //  photo from schaler.net

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In Gatsby [her memoir], Faye Dunaway writes that inside she's still Dorothy Faye, a poor, plain small-town North Florida girl, the child of a driven, dream-deprived mother and distant, alcoholic father. ...  She glosses over major love affairs without juicy details but does shed light on her personal demons.  On food and booze addiction: "You can look at my films and literally see it... that slowly I start the descent from thin to, well, thicker. I'd use food to counter the stress of filmmaking.  "I've never stopped guarding against a return to that kind of emotional reliance on food, and as I grew into this sophisticated world, alcohol. I'm finally beyond that now, but it was the pendulum I would swing on for years." Today, no alcohol, no cigarettes, no grains or sugar. Dunaway also works out regularly. As a result, she looks younger than her 54 years and is thankful Hollywood is now more receptive to "older women" in leading roles. [from article: "Dunaway still driven but able to enjoy the ride" by Elizabeth Snead, USA Today 12/02/99] **Looking for Gatsby: My Life - by Faye Dunaway

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Need a lift? Like it or not, human beings have always been attracted to "psychoactivity," says author Chris Kilham, and have searched out mind-altering and mood-modifying plants throughout history. "Psyche Delicacies" explores the five most commonly used psychoactive plants: coffee, chocolate, chiles, kava, and cannabis. All are "exquisite works of nature" that "can fit well into a healthy, active lifestyle with little or no harmful effects," writes Kilham, a biological researcher and author of several books. [Amazon.com review] ....Christopher Kilham. Psyche Delicacies: Coffee, Chocolate, Chiles,  Kava, and Cannabis, and Why They're Good for You

image from Godiva Chocolate

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....Losing Control: How and Why People Fail at Self-Regulation  by Roy F. Baumeister, et al

SELF-CONTROL COMES IN LIMITED  QUANTITIES, MUST BE REPLENISHED Self-control, whether used to pass up the office cookie plate or to struggle against temptations like alcohol and tobacco, operates like a renewable energy source rather than a learned skill or an analytical thought process, according to new research. Individuals had less physical stamina and impulse control and increased difficulty with problem-solving activities after completing a variety of tasks that required some measure of self-control, according to Roy F. Baumeister, Ph.D., of Florida State University.  The finding may be helpful in treating a number of behavioral health problems, from gambling disorders to alcoholism. "Learning more about how to maintain, increase and replenish this resource may hold one promising key to helping people avoid addiction," says Baumeister.  The study appears in the February 2003 issue of Alcoholism: Clinical and Experimental Research. There are three main theories about how self-control operates, according to Baumeister. One theory suggests that self-control depends on an energy or strength like "willpower," while a second theory considers self-control as a skill to be learned. Yet another theory views self-control as a thought process, where individuals process their different behavioral options and choose a course of action after analyzing their situation. To test these theories, Baumeister and colleagues designed a series of studies to determine whether self-control could be depleted, which would indicate that it was more like willpower than a skill or thought process.

For one experiment, individuals were asked to stifle or exaggerate their emotions while watching a disturbing video.  Afterward, their physical stamina was tested with a handgrip device. In another study, hungry participants were tempted with chocolate and freshly baked cookies before working on difficult geometric puzzles. In all cases, participants who exercised self-control were less able to complete the second task. "Resisting temptation consumed an important resource, which was then less available to help the person persist in the face of failure," Baumeister explains. He suggests that sleep may be one way that individuals can replenish self-control. "Most forms of self-regulation failure escalate over the course of the day, becoming more likely and more frequent the longer the person has been deprived of sleep," according to Baumeister, who notes that positive emotional experience may also help replace expended self-control energy.  Self-control exercises, like food diaries or efforts to regulate emotions, may help build the "strength" of self-control over the long run, although these findings are still preliminary. This study was supported by the National Institutes of Health. Feb. 19, 2003  By Becky Ham, Staff Writer, Health  Behavior News Service  www.hbns.org

 

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I don't think that there is an awareness or a belief in a lot of people that there is a solution and that there is life after recovery.  I thought that my life would be boring and that I would have no fun. My life is better today than it's ever been!   Mackenzie Phillips  from Steps for Recovery interview

Even though drug abuse was on the rise at that time across the nation, a 1996 Wayne State University survey of former child stars showed that child actors were three times more likely than the general population to drink and take drugs. Mackenzie Phillips, 41, who in 1983 was fired from "One Day at a Time" due to her drug habit, has been clean and sober for nearly 10 years. She speaks out against drug abuse, plays the mother on the Disney Channel series "So Weird," and currently is on stage in "The Vagina Monologues." She says a number of factors contributed to her addiction, including the habit of her father, singer-songwriter John Phillips. "You take someone like me who's a budding alcoholic and addict and give them access to every club in Los Angeles, a s---load of money, a boyfriend almost twice my age ...," she said. ...  And frankly, I think that people were afraid to say anything to me. Even though I was a teen-ager, I ruled the roost."  << from Daily News article: Babes in Hollywoodland by Valerie Kuklenski

**related book:*Joal Ryan. Former Child Stars: The Story of America's Least Wanted

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**************

"The best part [of getting off drugs] is being able to write good songs
again. Being able to draw good drawings again.

Being able to be creative again and enjoying it. All of that was gone."

    Stevie Nicks   [from official site The Nicks Fix]
   ...

"I had expected to come out of rehab and start writing immediately.
If you're in a good humor and you're feeling good, writing is pretty easy.
But my humor was gone. When you've been living in a bowl of depression,
you have to come back up to feel good enough to put a song down again."

 Stevie Nicks - after a program to get off prescription antidepressants.
        [LA Times, August 16, 2001]

  bio:  Stevie Nicks - Rock's Mystical Lady -- by Edward Wincentsen
 
 

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Lance Dodes, a Harvard psychiatrist with a longtime specialty in addiction, doesn't focus
on the genes that may make people susceptible to alcoholism, drug abuse or compulsive
gambling. Nor does he buy the common wisdom on how to attack addictions.

In his view, Alcoholics Anonymous and other 12-step programs fail because they don't
address the underlying problem behind addictive behavior.

Dodes believes that drinking, drug use and gambling (he directs the Boston Center for
Problem Gambling) are reactions to a person's feeling of helplessness.

When someone with an addiction feels helpless, Dodes says, he or she has a drink or
takes a drug to erase the resulting rage. The decision to engage in the addictive activity
creates a sense of empowerment, he argues, even though the action can spin the person
even further out of control.

Using composite profiles of patients he's treated in his 25-year career, Dodes says it's
possible to regain control first by identifying the signal that you're about to give in to
the addiction. Then, he says, you can learn to anticipate it and redirect your energy
to satisfy unmet emotional needs.

from review by Jane Allen of the book:   The Heart of Addiction: A New Approach to
Understanding and Managing Alcoholism and Other Addictive Behaviors by Lance M. Dodes
 

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"Addictions are common ways of coping with the pain of sexual abuse. They are usually
self-defeating and self-destructive. You can be addicted to dangerous situations, to crisis,
or to sex. You may have turned to drugs, alcohol or food to keep the memories down,
to numb feelings. Addictions must be curbed if you want to heal."

....from book:**
Ellen Bass, Laura Davis. The Courage to Heal : A Guide for Women Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse

related article: *Cognitive Accommodations to Childhood Sexual Abuse
 

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**********Christy Turlington

[Why did you decide to become a spokesperson for a smokefree lifestyle?]

Because my life has been greatly affected by the drug in terms of personal addiction as well as the loss of my father.

[How did you ultimately quit for good?]

I tried acupuncture, the patch, and hypnosis but found that I needed to do it alone - when the time was right for me.

[...any benefits from quitting?]

I feel much more clear-minded. There isn't any fogginess when I wake up. Nicotine is both a stimulant and a depressant,
so that can make one feel quite imbalanced.

    Christy Turlington

    [quotes and image from her CDC / Tobacco Information and Prevention Source site
 
 

<< related article: Smoking Cessation Harder For Women Than Men
"...more than 100 studies on smoking cessation ... found that women appear to suffer
greater risks of smoking-related diseases than men and tend to have less success
than men when they try to quit smoking."  Psychiatric News June 15, 2001

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Despite Big Tobacco's 1989 "voluntary" ban on tobacco product placements and pay-offs in movies, Hollywood is still a powerful channel for promoting the lethal addiction that kills 4 million people worldwide each year - smokers and non-smokers alike.  That's more than homicide, suicide, illegal drugs and AIDS combined The only way for an actor to smoke on screen is to do it with the camera running. If they refuse, it won't happen. Stars who insist on smoking because of their nicotine addiction -- particularly when they smoke identifiable brands -- are compromising the film and betraying their fans.  There is good scientific evidence that teens are more likely to smoke if their favorite actors smoke. from site: Smoke Free Movies

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Reward deficiency syndrome: genetic aspects of behavioral disorders

by Comings DE, Blum K [Prog Brain Res 2000;126:325-41]   [excerpt]

"The dopaminergic and opioidergic reward pathways of the brain are critical for survival
since they provide the pleasure drives for eating, love and reproduction; these are called
'natural rewards' and involve the release of dopamine in the nucleus accumbens and frontal lobes.

However, the same release of dopamine and production of sensations of pleasure can be produced
by 'unnatural rewards' such as alcohol, cocaine, methamphetamine, heroin, nicotine, marijuana,
and other drugs, and by compulsive activities such as gambling, eating, and sex, and by risk taking
behaviors.

Since only a minority of individuals become addicted to these compounds or behaviors,
it is reasonable to ask what factors distinguish those who do become addicted from those who do not.
It has usually been assumed that these behaviors are entirely voluntary and that environmental factors
play the major role; however, since all of these behaviors have a significant genetic component,
the presence of one or more variant genes presumably act as risk factors for these behaviors."

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"In my writing process, I feel an identification with bipolar experience.
Not being a natural writer, in order to write, to get ideas, I feel I have to simulate
almost a manic state... where I drink tons of coffee, I listen to music, I isolate myself,
I try to get on an idea jag to get material.

That's dangerous, because you take yourself out of your context; you mess with
your head in order to become liberated, to get ideas, to stimulate that production
of material. You get very high, very up. The downside is that you come down, too."

  Whit Stillman (writer/director: "Barcelona"; "The Last Days of Disco")
 [Psychology Today, May/June 1998]

*related page:**depression

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"A lot of it is self-esteem issues. Regardless of what you've acquired
or what you've achieved, if you don't feel you deserve it, there's a part of you
that always wants to give it back. A lot of that is about being an alcoholic...
[Now I'm realizing] it's okay to be respected."

Charles Sheen.....["20/20", Feb. 01.99]

*related page:**self-esteem / self concept

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******************

Hello Friends, Facing my addiction was one of the hardest things I've had to do in my life. I was fortunate
to have the support of my family and to have somewhere to go to find help.

However, there are so many who have an addiction, and need help, but don't know where to turn.
Alcoholics Anonymous and Narcotics Anonymous are two wonderful organizations that you can go to.

It is important to know that these two organizations will not disclose your identity to anyone. If you think
you have an addiction, do something. Please, if you need help, visit the Alcoholics Anonymous and
Narcotics Anonymous websites: www.aa.org and www.na.org. ...

Taking the first step is up to you.       Much Love, Melanie

from Recovery Journal of Melanie Griffith on her website: melaniegriffith.com

   photo from book: Timothy White: Portraits

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 Another exhibition I want to do is to look at the history of addiction
in the United States, because we tend to think of it as an urban problem
and a minority problem, but it's not.

We live in the city where Charles Carol lived. He signed the Declaration
of Independence, and if you tour his house, you'll see a portrait of his wife,
who died at age thirty-four of laudanum addiction.

The fact is, if you look back in colonial history, there was probably a lot more
self-medication going on then -- more widespread use of drugs -- than there is now.
We lose sight of that. We just criminalize it and do not see it's medical value
or how intrinsic it is to human nature.

Rebecca Hoffberger, founder and director of the American Visionary Art Museum

from newsletter of Online Noetic Network
 
 

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*********************

"A lot of good things have happened to me, and it's all because of sobriety."
 Elton John  ["Entertainment Tonight" Aug.99]

"I went into treatment [for drug and drink addiction], and I emerged with my eyes open...
Before that I didn't think of photography as an art form or otherwise."
Elton John - referring to his acclaimed photographic collection [Reuters, Nov.13.00]

"You can become so comfortable that your ends become blunted. I know I'm talented
and clever enough to write hit songs and do that for the rest of my life.

But I want to
have the hit have all of me on it. For some of the records I haven't been 100 percent there,
in part because of advances in the technology of making records. You become very comfortable
with having great producers around you, with being able to program a computer for a drum track
and let the technology sort of take over. I'm not knocking that, because it's a way of doing stuff,
but while all that was being done I would tune out.... To me the album ["Made in England"] sounds
as if it could have been made in that purple patch in the 1970s when I had all that energy.
I'm four and a half years clean and sober, so the energy's starting to come back."
  Elton John [Interview mag., April, 1995]

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[interviewer: With fame and celebrity come a lot of perks but also a lot of pitfalls. How are you trying to maintain a sense of normalcy in your life? ] I don't do drugs, and that to me is the main threat in this business. You can understand why people do drugs because it's such a high-tension, high-pressure job with people always seeing you and judging you. But I don't mess with that stuff. I don't really drink either.     Freddie Prinze Jr. [LA Times, Jan. 28, 1999]

 

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"I started going downhill after high school in terms of confidence and my life.
I was 18 and living at home. I was smoking pot, I didn't have a job, I wasn't
at school, I wasn't dancing, I wasn't acting. One day, someone said to me,
'You're a stoner.' And I thought, 'Oh, man, that's disgusting. No more pot.'
So I quit, and I started getting back on track."

   Jenna Elfman [Mirabella, March, 1999]
 

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*********************

"I am the adult child of an alcoholic. My childhood, and that of my brothers and sisters,
was robbed by a terrible and painful disease no one wanted to talk about. I wrote this
book for anyone who has ever hidden in a closet; for anyone who has experienced
the terror, the violence, the shame and embarrassment of living with an alcoholic.
I want you to know there is hope and there is help. I made it out. This is my story."

   Suzanne Somers     [quote from her site: suzannesomers.com

book: Keeping Secrets

 
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*****************

Johnny Depp confesses that "all of the emotions are still there, from happiness to sadness
to rage - it's all there and probably not too far from the surface. But I'm allowing myself
to say, 'OK, let's meet the demon. You can't hurt me any more than you already have.'

"I numbed myself and poisoned myself for so many years, only to find out that it's really selfish and dumb."

        [LA Times April 1, 2001]

related page: **emotion
 

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**********"You want to seem perfect. You don't want to seem like
there's anything wrong with you that you could get to that place, but that's
what the film is about and that's why Betty and I checked into rehab ourselves,
to find out what it's about. And once you're there, it's amazing what you learn
about your life. No one in this world should not go to rehab.

It's a place of honesty where you deal with happened in life...on a day to day basis.
I've never met anyone who handles everything, chemically, emotionally, biologically,
mentally - we're human beings, bound to crack. ...

We don't teach people how to survive, to be honest, to [take time to] take care
of ourselves emotionally. That's the last thing we're taught to do."

  Sandra Bullock  (about making her film 28 Days)  [Entertainment Today, 4.14-20.2000]
 

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"I never really asked my dad why he thought of me for Jackson, but he was aware I had a slight drinking problem at that time... It had to do with things that you don't talk about, very private and similar fears [to Pollock's] about the need for approval and attention and the desire to do something that makes me feel worthy." Ed Harris - about playing the lead in  Pollock..[mrshowbiz.go.com]

 

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*******

I had started experimenting with drugs... in the early '70s it was heroin, in the mid '70s to '80s it was cocaine.
But it was the lifestyle, the risk -- taking drugs with me across the border, going out of the country.

Being so high, flipping my car a couple of times. I could have gotten arrested. .. [these days] I would say I'm
very clean. I couldn't [have success without that]...

I mean, last year I sang with Plácido Domingo. Come on, please, there's no way I could have experienced that.
Or the fact that I was just going to get my career back. I had to kiss ass for a while. I had to be humiliated,
but, you know, I did it.

   Natalie Cole [eonline.com]

....her book: Angel on My Shoulder

 
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